Why do I even fucking care?

I don't know...

You tell yourself one thing and you always do another. Hypocrisy runs rampant in this world, and those who say otherwise are hypocrites. I'm not supposed to care, so I'll stop. But the truth is, I'll keep caring, I'll just stop showing it.

Fuck it, whatever.

I care too much about essentially nothing.
or at least that's what it always turns out to be...

I was prepared

to be hit by a ton of bricks and maybe a bus, but no, I wasn't prepared at all.


But I shouldn't complain, I brought this upon myself.
Oh, cruel irony. In attempts to make things better, I just made everything worse.

I must reinterpret everything and find the good in this situation. Look for the positives, but of course, it won't be easy.

Utilize everything to my advantage.


I stand upright now, but the corner stone has been damaged and it's only a matter of time before I breakdown.

Flesh Wounds

Push me off a ladder
and into a manhole
just to see
how much of a man
I can be.
Prescribe me something
to cope with the pain
but I don't take pills
I need not be medicated
but evaporated
because tears rain harder than hurricanes.
-Flash Flood Warning-
when it's time for mourning
but no one's died,
yet everyone cries.
Pick me up when I fall
just so I have a chance to fall down again.
Kick me while I'm down,
and everything feels like it's where it should be.
Then dislocate my left shoulder
and break my right arm
Then fracture my heart
and leave me disarmed
and take all your bullets
and stuff them down my throat
so that I know what it feels like to be loaded.
Feed me gun powder.
Light me on fire.
Don't be alarmed.
They are only flesh wounds
Then remember that
I am more than flesh
I am only human

R.I.P. Indie 103.1, Welcome Indie Online

"This is an important message for the Indie 103.1 Radio Audience -

Indie 103.1 will cease broadcasting over this frequency effective immediately. Because of changes in the radio industry and the way radio audiences are measured, stations in this market are being forced to play too much Britney, Puffy and alternative music that is neither new nor cutting edge. Due to these challenges, Indie 103.1 was recently faced with only one option --- to play the corporate radio game.

We have decided not to play that game any longer. Rather than changing the sound, spirit, and soul of what has made Indie 103.1 great Indie 103.1 will bid farewell to the terrestrial airwaves and take an alternative course.

This could only be done on the Internet, a place where rules do not apply and where new music thrives; be it grunge, punk, or alternative - simply put, only the best music.

For those of you with a computer at home or at work, log on to www.indie1031.com and listen to the new Indie 103.1 - which is really the old Indie 103.1, not the version of Indie 103.1 we are removing from the broadcast airwaves.

We thank our listeners and advertisers for their support of the greatest radio station ever conceived, and look forward to continuing to deliver the famed Indie 103.1 music and spirit over the Internet to passionate music listeners around the world."





Damn the music/radio/television industries these days.
I blame greed, dollar sign eyes and most people in America these days who want to watch and listen to the same shit over and over again.

Great shows, such as Pushing Daisies, get canceled and now, an entire radio station, one of the like three really worth listening to (the other two being KCRW and KUSC), is forced off the airwaves.

It was a slow process.
Great shows were being lost from Indie.
Community Service with Scott and Ken (The Crystal Method), Feel My Heat with Brent Bolthouse and Danny Masterson, and Big Sonic Heaven hosted by Darren Revell were all lost around October of 08, and the station was slowly declining. The departure of Joe Escalante as host of "The Last of the Famous International Morning Shows...", the morning show on Indie, was just a sign that something bad was happening. I loved Joe in the morning and TK was great in the afternoons, and he was doing fine as Joe's replacement, but there was something changing with the station that I don't think anybody at the station could have done anything about. It was one of my primary stations, and probably the one I listened to the most, but now, thanks to the idiots of the industry and the majority of people who have absolutely no taste at all, granted, listen to what you want...but seriously, come on? The same twelve songs on rotation every hour of every day?

With Indie, everyday I would listen and everyday I would hear at least two songs I have never heard on the radio, or have ever even heard at all. It never failed. I loved it.
My car ride's will be lame now. I definitely need to buy a CD player for my car now...

But, I can only look at this in a positive manner and say it's for the best. I'd rather have Indie be what it is than it turn into something that I would hate. I don't need another KROQ. I don't even like the one we have now.

But, as mentioned up in the official message from Indie, they will continue to broadcast online, where they will have the freedom beyond freedom. It will be great, I know it, and everything will be improved. Maybe, if the world is ever ready, there will be another station on the airwaves that has the heart, soul and passion for music that Indie did, or maybe Indie will get another chance when people realize what they're missing. Unfortunately, they never will.

So please join the Indie revolution. The station that would play almost any request. The station that had DJ's and guest DJ's buying songs off of iTunes right on the spot just to play it for their audience.

Music Activism.
INDIE ONLINE

http://indie1031.com

http://indie1031.com

http://indie1031.com

http://indie1031.com


I will miss this station on my travels.

.erick.

Vacant Spaces

Months go by and no one takes notice that in this infinite cycle and amongst the patterned pieces of our stop and go world, nothing is ever the same twice. Each breath you take will never mimic the previous one. Every blink of the eyes will happen at a different speed. Every emotional outpour unto some unsuspecting victim's ears or unto the attentive aural faciliies of a factory of empathy and advice that is a friend will always have a different outcome. No two seconds are the same.

We live in a world where time is measured, but never repeated. There is a phrase people say when a special small instance of time has been ruined. They say "The moment is gone." That is infinitely true for everything. Each second will never be repeated. Every moment is its own. At the very moment i write this it is 11:21pm, January 12th, 2009 and when this minute is up, never again will it be 11:21pm, January 12th, 2009.

Utilize life.

Let life be life.

Be you.


It has been a long time since I last had an entry. I don't see the 10 months between this entry and my last entry as being a big gap of nothingness, but more so vacant space. Just because I did not do anything in that entire time, it does not mean that there is nothing there. They are but vacant spaces occupied by invisible ideas that have yet to see daylight. Whether they ever will is yet to be answered. Our entire lives are full of ideas and many of them escape us before we have time to do anything with them. Yet, it does not mean they cease to exist, it merely means they are floating in the vacant spaces, waiting for the cosmonaut of our mind to explore the unknown regions of our inner thoughts and bring back the artifacts of ideas from within the depths of these vacant spaces. Yet, some of them will be floating aimlessly forever, but it does not mean they are gone forever, they remain within the realms of imagination and improbability, for nothing is impossible.

Moose Season and a Penguin's Shameless Self-Promotion

So my buddy Marcus has some great ideas, other than what are in his poems, stories, rants, etc...
So I can't help but jump on this ship and do this. So, Marcus here (The Erohed Journals) has created a couple more blogs, one for his poems (The Erohed Speaks) and one for something that was apparently almost his personal Armageddon (The Erohed Crowns).

Anyway, so I've decided to create one for my poems. I will keep this one for everything else, and throw all my poems into this one: Can't You Fix Me: Under the Skin of Countless Composition Books.

And my work-in-progress story, that you will be seeing as more is written can be found here: Anam's Journeys.

Thanks for the time everyone (or rather, Moose [Marcus]<--my key demographic, currently at 100% viewers in this demographic.) Be sure to check out all this blogs, and yeah. .erick.

.plug.

I have a friend. His name is Marcus. Much like me, he had an idea for a sort of chaptered kinda story, only his is in epic-like poem form and..um..well...done.

Here's a link to his blog: http://erohedjournals.blogspot.com/ (or in other words, here's a link to your blog Marcus, I think only you read this.)

Anyway, anyone who does read this, check it out. Marcus (Moose) is awesome.

Anyway, here is the link to mine. http://anamsjourney.blogspot.com
Once I get it started, I'll start posting chapters, parts, pieces, whatever.

Thank you.
.erick.